Separation Anxiety: Surviving Time Away From Baby

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As you read this, I'm trying to survive the longest stretch of time away from my daughter since she was born exactly 8 weeks ago. Honestly, I used to make fun of my friends who could barely go 15 minutes on a night off from their baby or young children, without calling home to check in on them. Then I became one of those parents. I remember the first time I left my daughter, Little D, at home with my mom when she was just a couple weeks old, so my husband and I could go out to dinner with friends for a breather and to knock us out of our sleep-deprived zombie state. Just minutes after we had finished ordering, I felt my breasts starting to tingle (aka filling up with milk). I promptly turned to my husband and friends and, in a very dramatic fashion, announced, "D must need me right now." I think I might have even clutched my bosom as I said that. I thought my daughter and I were so connected that she was calling out to me through my breasts. It was her way of saying, "Mommy, come home." But I didn't rush home right away. I remembered what she had just put me through. Plus, our friends drove (I didn't want to be rude). I did, however, call my mom to confirm what I was so sure my breasts were communicating. "Mom, is D okay? Does she miss me? She must be hungry. I could feel it." "She fell asleep after you left, dear," said my mom. "Oh." Maybe D wanted her parents to leave so she could get some sleep. That was during my maternity leave, when D had access to me, and my tingling breasts, pretty much 24/7. Now I must return to work, sadly. I've come to enjoy life with this little person so much that when D's asleep for longer than 3 hours, I wake her up because I want to play. Today I'm leaving her in the care of my mom, from whom I've demanded hourly picture message updates. I don't know how I will survive a whole workday away from my baby. Wish me luck! Or should I be wishing my mom or D luck? When I start to "fill up" at work today, I'll be thinking of D and wondering if she realizes how much time has passed since she's seen or heard Mommy. If she does, I hope she will forgive me.

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