Happy Monday, everyone!
Today we’re kicking off the week with a little
Rockabye Baby Etiquette 101. (By the way, if you haven’t read the
“How to Hold Other People’s Babies” post, you must!) The lesson of the day is simple:
Sh*t you should never say to a new parent.
1) “Your baby is really cute . . .” if you don’t mean it. We may not be getting much sleep, but when you become a parent, it’s like your BS radar goes up a notch. So if you’re not being sincere when showering our kid with compliments because you feel obliged to, we’ll know. And those fake smiles . . . save ’em.
2) “Are you getting much sleep?” No. But you know that already so don’t remind us that we aren’t. And you probably don’t want to spend the short amount of time you have our undivided attention talking about how little sleep we’re getting, right?
3) “Are you free fill in the blank night?” During the early months, seriously, there is no “free” time and when there is, it’s likely spent doing things like catching up on sleep, eating uninterrupted and, you know, showering.
4) “You look good . . .” if you don’t mean it. See #1. But it’s nice of you to say so. I personally think I look better sleep deprived, but my husband looked like a wreck. A loveable wreck, but if you’re someone who is used to an average of 7-8 hours of sleep a night, well, good luck!
5) “Why don’t you fill in the blank . . .” Frankly, if you’re thinking of saying anything to a new parent that starts with those 3 words, best to reword in a different way. One of the most annoying things we could do without is all the unwanted advice. Yes, we probably vent about all the things that are bothering us because of #3, but sometimes we just want someone who doesn’t (lovably) spit, poop or pee on us all day. Now, if we actually ask you, pointedly, your help on something, please share!
6) “Will you have another?” Um, how about you try asking after we’ve survived the first year.
Now, it’s your turn….
What are things YOU think you should never say to a new parent?
Tell us in the comments below to enter our random drawing for this super-cool bundle! One (1) winner will be selected. Enter by Monday, April 21 at 12 pm PT. So, go ahead, vent away!
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25 comments
“You shouldn’t do that!” or “You’re not doing it right!”- nothing more unnerving than having someone tell you you’re doing something wrong or something you shouldn’t be doing at all. You may be new to the whole parenting game BUT it doesn’t make you an idiot. You know your child better than anyone so do what you feel is best! :)
Stephanie T
“I will babysit for you,” when you never actually intend to do so.
Ashley Kemp
Sleep when the baby sleeps. If you want some semblance of a life, don’t sleep when baby sleeps, unless you enjoy 17 minute naps.
Rachel
Let’s see…
Why are you so tired? Hmmm…I don’t know…try many nights of broken sleep.
You used to do such and such and now you don’t. Sorry…again that whole sleep deprivation thing again!
And nothing drives me insane than being compared to other people. Maybe they were super women who could take care of everything and everyone on little sleep…but I guess that’s not me!
Jennifer T
I agree on the “why aren’t you doing ____?” This could apply to breastfeeding vs formula feeding, babywearing vs strollers, cry-it-out vs responsive parenting. Everyone has their own way of trying things out, and will eventually come to a solution that works for their family. If they want help or advice, they will ask or seek it out themselves.
Megan M
Felicia R
Things You Should Never Say to a New Parent:
No, it never stops crying or pooping!
You’ll get used to it… someday.
Yes, your baby drools more than a dog.
I hope you enjoyed what sleep you got.
Babies are like little drunks, you can never understand them, they’ll puke everywhere, and then pass out.
They only pee on you if they like you.
That smell in there diaper only gets worse as they get older.
Dj DIESEL
Are they sleeping through the night yet? MAN, I HATED THAT! lol
Erin W
You just have to do it this this _____. It’s the only thing that worked for us!
There is always more than one way to do it and there is no “right way” for everyone!
Also commenting on the size of the baby- “too big” or “too small”. This alienates parents. You don’t know what kind of genetics or environmental factors attributed to this kiddos size. Be kind!
Alex Porter
“Are you using the ____? we got you”? We appreciate gifts but they don’t require we use them all immediately and in the fashion the person who gave the gift intends.
Mark D
Are you really going to make me use hand sanitizer before I hold the baby?!
Kevin Sowa
“Is this your first grandchild?” I’ve gotten this twice. I was only 37 ouch!
Christie Vinson
Did you get a chance to see (fill in new release movie or awesome traveling music act)? It was amazing!!!!
cori gilbert
Do you think it’s weird he does;t look like you? (when he does and i definitely remember his exit!)
soumiya
I think he’s/she’s hungry. Are you sure you’re feeding her enough?
So annoying. It’s like, "no b*tch, I starve my baby for fun. -_ What is wrong with mother-in-laws or sisters? Of course I feed my baby. He gets stomach problems (acid reflux) and over feeding causes it to worsen. I’ve read, although this is ny first baby, I know what I’m doing. Anyway I love your music. My Instagram name is @Magickal_thoughts and I’ve posted pics of your music before. Thank you.
Also, Do you change his diaper enough? Is another one.
And do you clean him enough is a third.
Shannon Murphy
My mother told me this: "You’re gonna feel liks you’re in jail once the baby is here. :)
Shannon Murphy
“is baby sleeping through the night yet?”
marmota
“he/she seems uncomfortable”
Lily G
Sleep when the baby sleeps… Yeah right, so should I cook when the baby cooks, clean when the baby cleans and do laundry when the baby does laundry too?
Adrianna Simms
My babies all slept through the night from 4 weeks old; you must be doing something wrong.
Deborah
“Let me know if I can help/if you need anything” This is great, if you mean it. If you aren’t willing to wash dishes, fold laundry, or vacuum the house don’t bother to offer your help.
Jen
He is looking a bit scrawny (friend said this to me when I was struggling to breastfeed)
Janet
“It only gets harder!” Or “It never gets easier!” Or how about “Just wait until your baby is….(fill in the blank)”
Ashley
You’ve got another 18 years of this…
It doesn’t get any better you know…
You soon manage to cope on 3 hours sleep a night…
Glenn Marvell-James
when you feel like a zombie:
‘..its only fair you get up to baby every hour through the night, dad works, while you get to stay at home and rest all day..’
‘..ugh! why THAT name?..’
‘..another girl/boy?.. try making a girl/boy next time..’ or ‘..bet you wish you had a girl/boy instead..’
‘.. in my day we did xyz..’
‘… in my day we managed to cook gourmet, clean to perfection, child rear genius’ annnd still look pretty for our husbands..’
so many things to be said.. people should come with a filter!
C. Williams
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